By L. Crystal Michallet-Romero
Copyright © February 8, 2002 L. Crystal Michallet-Romero
All Rights Reserved
Reworked: January 14, 2004
MCA/Universal and Renaissance Pictures. All other characters are mine.
Rated: NC – 17
Violence: Yes
Sexual Violence: Yes
Subtext: Yes
Extra Warning: As Alti raised the main character I feel it’s necessary to warn that this story deals with child
abuse and molestation issues. It may trigger abuse issues for some. This story should be unpleasant for all
readers, but to know Ari, it’s important to know where she came from.
Announcement: I'm fully aware that the use of Italics, according to grammar rules, is meant to be used
sparingly and only to emphasize certain words. However, for the comfort of the readers, all sections of the
story that can be construed as childhood abuse scenes are now placed in Italics in order that anyone may skip
these more disturbing scenes if they so wish. I decided that as long as I knew the rule, then it would be all right
to break it especially if it helps the reader.
All Feedback Welcomed at: CrystalMichallet@yahoo.com
Note to Readers:
The spelling of the bard’s hometown, Potidaea, is taken from The Times Atlas of World History (Atlas 75).
Ari found herself submerged deep within a raging storm of dreams. The images flashed before her with the
quickness of lightning. Only a very few stayed long enough for her to catch a glimpse of, and even those were
too horrific for her to view for long. At one point she saw the form of a child, the innocent eyes gazing at her,
pleading for help. At first she thought she was seeing herself as a child, but as she tried to move toward the
girl, the figure was quickly replaced with the carnage of a battle. In the dream, the young warrior studied the
battlefield, taking in the view of the mass of bodies strewn over the land. She tried to turn away, but her feet
were held in place by the sticky blood that seemed to ooze from the earth. When she looked closer, she saw
amidst the butchery, the single face of the little girl, now dead, her body frozen and discolored as her empty
eyes looked directly into her own.
With an inward shudder, Ari felt herself trying to pull away from this nightmare. She vainly fought to turn away
from the scene. What she saw instead was her reflection in a pool of blood at her feet. The dark warrior saw
herself in the armor of black, the gold inlaid designs covered with blood. When she looked down at her hand,
she saw her sword shining red in the sun; the edge covered in blood… her hands covered in blood…
Panting and out of breath, the dreamer broke free of her nightmare and opened her eyes. She instantly felt a
cold chill against her flesh. She forgot where she was and glanced around in confusion, the dream still very real
within her mind. She expected to feel the soft furs of her mother's bed, the heavy pelts keeping them warm as
her mother slept soundly beside her. But instead, Ari was out in the open under a canopy of stars. Where
there should have been the darkness of the cave’s ceiling, in its place were now tree limbs hanging high above
her. As her mind tried to fathom the change, she sat up and glanced down at herself, surprised that she was in
her undergarments; that she no longer wore her outer clothing.
Confused, she pushed back the cover of her bedroll and looked around in bewilderment. Rather than a single
fire pit in the corner of the cave for warmth, she saw a round campfire, the fire's flames now replaced with
glowing embers. In only a matter of seconds, Ari closed her eyes as her mind tried to comprehend if this was
yet another dream or if it was real.
As her troubled mind fought for clarity, the young girl heard the slight whispers in the back of her mind. Like a
jumbled incantation, the slight voices rose in the darkness to surround her senses. Although these whispers had
first come to her when she entered this world, Ari had quickly learned how to keep them at bay with her
mother's help. For a while the lessons from Alti worked, but now that she was with her adopted family, the
whispered voices had begun to slowly return with a vengeance.
Calling upon all of her inner strength, Ari pushed the clamor aside until the whispers were nothing more than a
slight droning vibration. She fought to remember the events that had brought her into these present
circumstances. The flimsy memories played through her mind. When she finally remembered where she was,
and whom she was with, she glanced at the bedrolls around the campfire. Through the embers of the fire, she
saw the outline of her birthmother and Gabrielle snuggled in an embrace under their bedroll. Nearby Eve lay
nestled under her covers; the only parts of her that were visible were her fingertips.
Like before, Ari felt confused and disoriented as she tried to remember how she had gotten near the campfire.
As she glanced at Eve's bedroll, she remembered the anger that the prophet had spewed at her yet was unable
to fully understand it. The vague dreams that plagued the girl's soul caused an unfamiliar pain deep within her
heart and although she could not remember doing what Eve accused her of, the nightmares were enough to
make her wonder if Eve was right.
“What redemption could there be, for one like me?” She wondered as she fought to remember, to grasp hold
of anything that would confirm that she had tried to rape her sister. When no images came to mind, she only
sighed in defeat as the pain began in her head. As fresh tears threaten to spill, Ari closed her eyes tightly as she
fought for control. She was always aware of Xena's love for Eve and she knew that the warrior princess could
never forgive anyone who would hurt her youngest daughter, even if the crime had been committed by her
oldest daughter.
Ari understood her position in Xena's life. For Ari, it didn't matter what the warrior princess said, because she
knew the truth and more importantly, she knew how her birthmother thought of her. She would never be able
to rise to the level of Eve. Even though she was Xena's firstborn daughter, nothing she did would help her to
be viewed as anything more than the daughter of Alti, the evil sorceress who was the older warrior's worst
enemy. “It doesn’t matter if I can or can’t remember it. Eve's accusation just proves to Xena who my true
mother is,” she concluded. After Eve's revelation, Ari knew that there was nothing that she could do or say
that would change her birthmother's mind. Although in the past the older woman was quick to claim her as a
daughter, the girl believed that deep down inside, the warrior princess felt that she was as evil as Alti. Now,
after Eve's words, the teenager was certain that Xena would never change her opinion, and perhaps in this the
warrior princess was correct.
Ari realized that redemption was not for her because Xena's worst enemy had raised and taught her many
things – things that the warrior princess found abhorrent. The young warrior remembered the lessons of Alti,
her firm hand controlling everything that the child did, from learning how to sword fight, to hand to hand
combat. When a lesson was needed that Alti could not teach, the sorceress would simply leave and return
with a teacher in tow. With a shudder, the teen closed her eyes against the onslaught of memories from her
childhood. She could not bear to remember what would happen to her teachers when they were no longer
needed.
Only after the final confrontation with Xena, did the young warrior begin to realize the lies of her mother. Alti
had not been truthful with her, and in her deceit, she had doomed Ari's soul. “I may not have been the one to
end my tutors’ lives, but I might as well have been,” she thought grimly as a sorrow filled her heart. “If I could
have hurt people, like I did in my dreams, then surely I must have tried to hurt Eve.”
